“i can’t stand perry noble!”

i said that a lot to my husband a few years ago.

so, why the empathic disgust?  well, it’s obvious, don’t you think?  perry was bold and brash.  he had and shared his super strong opinions on church growth, how to do ministry, and a plethora of other terrible topics.  he was one of those pastors.  the ones that only cared about relevance and numbers.

a spiritual leader? pssshhhaw. what-ev-er.

and of course, the world needed to be warned.  back in my xanga blogging days, i actually encouraged people to send perry emails about a katrina relief campaign he was doing, saying how he was using a tragedy to get people into church (of all things!) i got into blog comment fights about him.  and once, i even had to ask tony morgan to remove one of the comments i left because after sleeping on it, i realized how flat out mean it was.

seriously.  perry and his blog made me so angry, i actually unsubscribed from it for a year or so.

and then my world got flipped upside down on me a few times.  i came crashing down in a pile of pride and self-righteousness and oh wow, was it ugly, and messy, and shameful.

and over the last year or so, i’ve had such clarity in how stupid i was.  how i was projecting my own lack of confidence and faith and pride and issues on perry.  i don’t know why he became the target, but he was.  i sent an email apologizing.  and perry was gracious enough not only to forgive me, but to selflessly contribute a “second opinion” section to mad church disease.

last night, i was talking to my husband chris at cracker barrel (which is what honestly sparked this whole post.  if you know anything about perry, you know his affinity for their biscuits).  and i saw the whole journey, from five years ago until now.  and how perry hasn’t changed much, but my perspective of him has.  and how that has little to do with him and more to do with the fact i stopped am trying to stop being a self-righteous jerk ball.

and i also think how i still read church blogs where someone thinks someone else’s church or ministry is awful, or how they’re doing things wrong, or for the wrong reason. or how they’re spending money inappropriately, or how “trendy” they are, or…whatever.

GET OVER IT.

that’s it. GET OVER IT.

it’s not worth it.  and if you’ve ever had the mirror turned back on you, you know exactly what i mean.

phillipians 1:18 has been a key verse in this journey of mine:

“So how am I to respond? I’ve decided that I really don’t care about their motives, whether mixed, bad, or indifferent. Every time one of them opens his mouth, Christ is proclaimed, so I just cheer them on!”

it’s easy to forget in general, but ESPECIALLY on blogs, there are so many people who aren’t believers looking in.  what kind of example are we setting?  that we’re a bunch of cry babies who can’t get along? a lot of the time…YES. that is exactly what we’re saying.

suck up the pride, bite your tongue, and listen to your momma.

if you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothin’ at all.

people will know us by the love we have for each other.

remember that.

Related posts:

1. Talk Less - Listen More…on Church Conferences
2. i can’t stand my perry noble post!
3. how to lead a tribe (part 2)
4. next year could eat me* for lunch (*or you)
5. mystery shoppers in churches
6. keeping your mouth shut!