FlowerDust.net

Last year, I had the amazing opportunity to host Catalyst Backstage - a behind the scenes look at Catalyst with interviews with speakers, pastors, and conference attenders. You can see some of those interviews here.

This year, I will be hosting Backstage again, and also will be speaking at Catalyst Labs with Los and Jon. As much as I love the Catalyst experience as a whole, the Lab day is secretly my favorite part of the event. Smaller environments, people sitting on the floor, up the walls, wherever there is space hearing exclusive and intimate conversation and thought by the Lab speakers. So…I must highly recommend you not only register for Catalyst, but please register for the Lab day. You will NOT regret it!!!

Anyway, today (Thursday) is the last day you can register at the cheapest rate. And rumor has it if you use the word “TONY” when you register you save even more money.

I personally wonder what other four letter words will get you a discount.

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Recently, there have been some very serious questions asked about Mad Church Disease, and instead of writing an impersonal post, I thought I’d address you guys a little more formally, via video.

Please see below:

(This is what happens when you have some free time and a video camera late at night after the NBA Finals are over. And, just to clarify, no pastors were insulted in the making of this video. Andy Stanley also looks good, and Ed Young knows how to lead. Thankyouverymuch.)

Every once in a while, you’ll stumble on an author who makes you say, “That’s exactly what I’ve been feeling!” Someone, somewhere found the ability and artistry to take an emotion and name it. But not only do they label it, they expound on it. Where did this emotion come from? What does it mean? Where is it taking me? What should I do with it?

But perhaps more profound is the experience of community. You realize you’re not alone in feeling or thinking a particular way.

You’re not going crazy.

And if you are, at least someone’s going there with you.

Such is the case with my friend Frank Viola. Eons ago (in social media world, that translates into about six months), Frank sent me a message on Facebook, humbly introducing himself. As if I didn’t already know who he was and didn’t already devour every word he and George Barna wrote in the book Pagan Christianity. Still, I tried to play it cool.

He had a new book releasing called From Eternity to Here and wanted to know if I’d take a look. I told him I needed to think about it. I was scared. Pagan Christianity messed me up enough and because I was in a busy season of life, I couldn’t afford to lose my sanity. He sent it anyway, and I waited until just recently to read it.

Frank writes with a style you almost wouldn’t expect. Very very smart people with lots of letters after their name review and discuss his work and use lots of Greek words I kind of remember from the one Bible class I took ten years ago. I was intimated. I didn’t need to be.

Poetically, thought-provokingly, and, as the academics would say, very very smartly Frank unfolds the story of God’s heartbeat. His mission. His love.

One of my favorite takeaways from From Eternity to Here says this about Mary of Magdala.

“Indeed, Mary of Magdala is a study in undying love. I ask you: What provoked such unending devotion? It was simply this: Mary believed the Lord’s opinion of her. She took His opinion of herself rather than her own. In doing so, love was awakened within her own heart for Christ…

Therefore, the next time you feel condemnation over your past, please remember this one thing: The first person to lay eyes upon the resurrected Lord was a former prostitute.

God chose Mary Magdalene from the foundation of the world, knowing the kind of life she would live. And He chose you and me from the foundation of the world, knowing full well all the mistakes we would make this side of the veil.

You have a Lord who wishes to cherish you. Neither your fallen nature nor your sins are an obstacle for Him. He has dealt with them thoroughly, completely, and willingly by His death and resurrection.

Never forget: This God of yours allowed a prostitute to love Him extravagantly in the house of a Pharisee. Such is the wonder of the sacred romance into which every believer has been swept up. So go in peace, and love your Lord like Mary did.”

Dang, y’all.

I asked Frank if I could give ten copies of From Eternity to Here away for our Thursday book giveaway, to which he kindly complied. Assuming you didn’t already click on the link and buy it yourself, here’s how you can win.

To be entered, leave a comment with something you’ve always wondered (For example, mine would be “Am I the only one who wonders why blog posts on missions or social justice don’t get half the traffic of a book giveaway post?”) - and be entered. I’ll pick winners next Thursday and they shall be notified via electronic post. (That’s email). Use the TWEET THIS button below to earn double credit.

So…what do you wonder?

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A few weeks ago, I told you about a partnership that I’m very honored to be in with a new web video teaching community called Innovative Ministry Leader.

Today, they launch! And they’re using a session of Mad Church Disease to kick it off! In this 20-ish minute video, I talk about my own journey through burnout, some principles for recovery, and what Scripture says about sacrifice and rest in ministry.

You can sign up today and use the promo code FLOWERDUST to get a 10% discount on your membership (any level - one month, six month, or one year) and your subscription is all inclusive meaning you can use it whenever, as many times as you like, wherever. Your whole staff or ministry team can watch the videos all for the price of one subscription.

Upcoming speakers are Jeff Deyo, Troy Gramling, Sheri Gould, Greg Stielstra, Jonathan Lee, Dino Rizzo, Paul Jackson, Tommy Kyllonen, Aaron Linne, Mark Batterson, Ross Parsley, Glenn Packiam, Skye Jethani, Carl Cartree and Jud Wilhite…they are adding more all the time, too!

I took a 40 second clip out of my video so you can kind of get a feel for it.

And, if you sign up now, you get eight of the Leadership Network Innovation Series books through Zondervan. You can see what those books are here.

Also, here’s a little screen grab of one of my videos (there are two more videos coming - one about pornography addiction and another about depression). I could have totally chose a more flattering photo, but there’s nothing like a little self deprecation.

The best caption for this photo wins a copy of Mad Church Disease!

Ok, so, we’ve debunked the myth that building a platform is the most important thing for an emerging artist and instead discussed how building character and relationships first will eventually lead to a more solid way to spread a message.

Here is the third and final part of this lil’ series:

Effort #3

Don’t build your platform, build your message.

It sounds a little over-simplistic, I realize, but hear me out. If you’re anything like me, once something has implanted itself so deeply in your heart, you want to shout it from the rooftops.  I remember being 24 years old and intensely passionate about originality in the church. This was about the same time when a lot of contemporary churches were making sermon series parodies of popular TV shows and movies - incluidng my own church. Coming from a creative corporate background, and being a rule-follower, the copyright implications alone were enough to make me uncomfortable. But I also believed (and still believe) that there is a huge difference between inspiration and emulation, and so many churches were falling into the emulation category.

Sorry. Soapbox over.

Anyway, I had voiced my opinions (passionately) having the platform of Director of Communications/Media and had been repeatedly shot down. A few months into my position, I attended a small conference where Rob Bell spoke and later had some down time where he invited anyone to come and hang out. Just two or three of us took him up on it. I asked him a question about originality in the church, shared my thoughts, and he simply said, “Don’t let your passion become annoying.”

Ouch!

I’ve learned a lot in the last five years and have realized the importance of building a message through more than just passionately vocalizing it. To build your message, you have to continuously ask yourself, “Why do I believe this?,” “What are the implications of the message?,” “What’s required of me to dedicate this season to this message?,” “Is there a need for this message?,” “How can I learn more about this and sharpen my own knowledge and passion?”

Building a message takes time. It takes repetition of simple communication. It takes being able to handle criticism and even change the course if it’s not the right one. It takes flexibility. It takes commitment.

Your message should be timeless, and not trendy. Sure, trendy is catchy. Trendy is noticeable. But trendy is not remarkable.

Having a message spread wide and having your message resonate deeply are two very different things. They are not mutually exclusive, but more often than not, we settle for a season of brief popularity.

If your message is as important as you think it is, take the time and expend the energy to make it stick…to allow it the time to embed in the hearts of others. When others are influenced as much as you have been, it will continue to spread both deep and wide in a meaningful way.

It’s been a trip to read a few of the emails I’ve received since shutting down my Facebook. If you don’t spell out everything, people make assumptions. Here are a couple of my favorite “Is this really why you shut down Facebook?” questions:

• Were you being tempted to get involved with another man?
• Were you addicted to the games?
• Did you and your husband fight about the amount of time you spent on Facebook?

Allow me just a moment to clear the air — NO! None of those. I spent a few minutes one day a week on Facebook. I didn’t play a single game, ever. And um, no…, I’m happy to say I didn’t have any issues with boundaries. :)

If I could sum it up in one sentence, I closed my Facebook account because it was all about platform and not about relationships. I had a disclaimer on it saying, “Hey, I’m never on here, so don’t message me!” and turned it into an autofeed of blog posts and Twitter. I had all the notifications turned off so I never got anything in my email. All talk, no listen. No relationships.

Yesterday, we talked about building character…today…

Effort #2

Instead of focusing on building your platform, build relationships.

Online, that’s why I’ve decided to keep blogging and using Twitter. I feel like I can actually have conversations with people and interact pretty easily.  Which is also why I don’t follow a gazillion people on Twitter.

I’d rather connect and converse intimately with 100 people who share the same passion, encouragement, and values than with 2500 people who I would just be barking to. Sure something may stick now and again, but it’s not as meaningful as it could be.

Offline is just as intentional. There are a handful of people that have been placed in my life to learn from, to grow with, and to also encourage and I want to be open to having these relationships flourish.

Whether online or offline, relationships that give people permission to talk and listen (and know they are being heard) are what help a message solidify and spread.

Your thoughts?

If I had a dollar for every time somebody asked, “How can I build an online platform?” I’d probably have more money than Oprah. Okay. Maybe not that much money, but I’d definitely be a little better off.

With social media being the giant that it is today, every artist is attempting to discover how they can build a larger online audience. Many people think that’s the missing ingredient from their big break, and so they pour a ton of energy into creating a platform.

To begin, I think the idea of building a platform is bogus. Instead, I think there are three other ways we can intentionally spend our efforts into creating movement behind a message. And that’s what we’re going to discuss a little this week.

Effort #1

Instead of focusing on building your platform, build your character.

A platform is what other people see and hear you speak from. It’s what you’ve decided to allow to be public. It’s the mouth of your message.

But what’s behind that mouth? If you’ve spent all your time and energy dressing up the platform, but you haven’t spent any time building your character and integrity, your message won’t have two legs to stand on. It may look pretty from the outside. It may even look perfect from the outside, but when push comes to shove, your platform is built on sand and will easily crash down when the first wave hits. It won’t matter how flawless your  platform appeared to be. Your message will be lost.

Spending time building the inside before you spend time building the outside is time well spent.

Have you seen an example of a perfect platform collapsing? What kind of impact did that have on the message?

Well, this is ironic.

I had the good intent of getting this post up about five hours ago, but you know what? I had a mess of random things come up in my schedule and I’ve literally spent most of my day away from my computer.

If, by some chance, I would have actually LISTENED to my friend Tony’s wisdom in his book Killing Cockroaches, I might have been able to plan, delegate, say no, redirect, and focus a little better.

Lesson learned.

Again.

So, before we get to the book giveaway stuff, you have to know Tony’s going on tour. I don’t know if he’ll be giving out hugs, if he’ll have pyrotechnics, or even a 300 pound body guard with zero body fat escorting him to and from his Prevost, but regardless, if he’s in your area, you have to have to be a part of the tour. And it’s cheaper than taking your team out to lunch. If you took them to the Melting Pot and not McDonalds, I mean.  Details are here.

Tony has been generous enough to donate ten copies of Killing Cockroaches to the Anne Jackson Book Giveaway fund. To be entered, leave a comment having to do with anything roach related - literal or metaphorical - and be entered. I’ll pick winners from both this giveaway and the Mad Church Disease giveaway next Thursday and the winner shall be notified via electronic post. (That’s email). Use the TWEET THIS button below to earn double credit.

Ready? Go.

You must decide for yourself to whom and when you give access to your interior life. For years, you have permitted others to walk in and out of your life according to their needs and desires. Thus you were no longer master in your own house, and you felt increasingly used. So, too, you quickly became tired, irritated, angry and resentful.

Think of a medieval castle surrounded by a moat. The drawbridge is the only access to the interior of the castle. The lord of the castle must have the power to decide when to draw the bridge and when to let it down. Without such power, he can become the victim of enemies, strangers, and wanderers. He will never feel at peace in his own castle.

It is important for you to control your own drawbridge. There must be times when you keep your bridge drawn and have the opportunity to be alone, or with those to whom you feel close. Never allow yourself to become public property where anyone can walk in and out at will. You might think you are being generous to anyone who wants to enter or leave, but you will soon find yourself losing your soul.

When you claim for yourself the power over your drawbridge, you will discover new joy and peace in your heart and find yourself able to share that joy and peace with others.

-Henri Nouwen, The Inner Voice of Love

At first when I read this, I couldn’t decide if I was convicted or turned off.

“But I want my life to be open to everyone.”

Alas, as I thought about it more, I realize he didn’t say “never lower the drawbridge and stay safely inside your castle.” Instead, Nouwen enforces the importance of emotional boundaries. Boundaries which need to be in tact to make you strong so you can accomplish your unique, global purpose. Jesus did it in Luke 4.

I think if we look at his context, maybe we can feel a bit more free to occasionally retreat and replenish.

How do you do at controlling the drawbridge? Do you agree or disagree with what Nouwen is saying?

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So here’s something you need to know about.

I’ve partnered with a new web-based video teaching/training site that launches next month called Innovative Ministry Leader. And the crazy kids over there are using my little video to launch things on June 9th! It was a great experience working with these guys. Even though it was the day Nashville got pounded by tornadoes, that didn’t stop them from doing the video shoot!

Following me in the month of June are videos from Jeff Deyo (Sonic Flood guy), Troy Gramling, Sheri Gould, Greg Stielstra, Doug Gould, Jonathan Lee, Dino Rizzo, Paul Jackson (no relation!) Tommy Kyllonen, Mark Batterson, Ross Parsley, Glenn Packiam, Skye Jethani, Carl Cartee, Jud Wilhite….and the list continues to grow.

Innovative Ministry Leader is the world’s first complete web-based training center for today’s leaders. It allows EVERYONE from your team (one person or one million) teaching and insight from innovative leaders from around the world.

IML has video teaching in the areas of leadership, worship, marketing, culture and technology.

Every month IML features new web-based videos that range in length from 20 to 60 minutes. There are areas for people to engage in chat rooms as they watch the teaching and even has a “buddy list” of sorts so you can connect with leaders with similar interests.

All videos are archived as well, so you can access them at anytime!

It’s a monthly subscription and it is SO affordable…$34.99/month for unlimited access to everything. Again — that is for your WHOLE staff, leadership team, volunteers, whoever!

**And…I’m happy to announce the first 150 people who register will receive all 8 of the Leadership Network Innovation Series books FREE!**

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-Deliberate Simplicity by Dave Browning
-Confessions of a Reformission Rev  by Mark Driscoll
-The Multisite Church Revolultion by Geoff Surratt, Greg Ligon and Warren Bird
-Leadership from the Inside out by Kevin Harney
-The Big Idea by Dave Ferguson
-The Monkey & The Fish  by Dave Gibbons
-Sticky Church by Larry Osborne
-Servolution by Dino Rizzo

So…click over, check it out, sign up…and can’t wait for June 9th when some Mad Church Disease teachin’ will be going down.

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One of my friends emailed me last week about the boundaries I’ve set for some of my online habits. He wanted to talk about them a little bit more, and jokingly said “I’m addicted to that stuff!”

His remark sent me into one of those little ADD brain tangents I frequently find myself in…(to which he received the brunt of in my return email).

We wouldn’t joke around about an addiction to porn, or to alcohol, but we do joke around about being addicted to technology.

And so I wonder…are we?

My friend Mike has a good, unofficial way of finding out. If you wonder if you’re addicted to something, take a break - cold turkey - for two weeks. See how long you make it. You’ll get a pretty good idea if you’re addicted or not.

Could you imagine taking two weeks off from Twitter or Facebook or your RSS reader or…?

More importantly, would you?

A few of us Cross Point people are going to Unleash on March 12 and we can’t wait!

I’ve never been to NewSpring before and have been wanting to for a couple of years now…plus, getting to connect with other pastors and leaders is one of my favorite things in the world to do!  And with 2000 people there I’m sure there are quite a few leaders I could learn a ton from while I’m there!

AND IT’S REALLY STINKING INEXPENSIVE!  LIKE FIFTY NINE BUCKS INEXPENSIVE!

From the website:

Unleash is a one-day conference hosted by NewSpring Church and specifically-designed to challenge, encourage and motivate church leaders to take action in reaching their communities for Jesus Christ. Unleash 2009 happens on March 12th at our Anderson Campus and features two main sessions from Senior Pastor Perry Noble, tons of breakout sessions and quite a few creative and technical tricks up our collective sleeve. Southern hospitality awaits you.*

(Emphasis mine…I fully expect that “southern hospitality” means Tony Morgan will be giving out hugs to everyone.  And that Perry will be serving us buttery biscuits upon our arrival.)

Okay, okay, okay…so what’s with this “FREE” tickets thing?  Well, since I was going to be blogging about Unleash and all, I decided to ask Tony for a free ticket to give away.  He fired back with something along the lines of “One ticket? You are super lame. How dare you even ask me for such a simple thing.  ONE? Come on, Jackson. You just want ONE ticket? How about FIVE free tickets? So someone’s entire team can come? Because it’s all about the team.”

Okay. Maybe I made the first part of that up.  But he really did want to give away five tickets so a whole team could come.

Uh, deal.

So I’m giving away FIVE free tickets to Unleash!

To enter, leave me a comment telling me what creative thing you’re going to do with the money you’ll be saving by not having to pay and I’ll pick someone at random on Wednesday sometime…whenever I feel in the mood to end it! :)

And if you don’t win - just register! But you better hurry.  It’s super close to being sold out!

Ready? Go!

i’m totally kidding, by the way.  you’re not a peon.

but most of us aren’t senior pastors.  very few of us who read this blog are the big time decision makers.  most of us are support staff.

and in such roles, we often face difficult questions.  our culture of subconscious (or conscious) hierarchies, combined with our sincere respect, and in some cases a fear for our job can leave us wondering what to do if we think our lead pastor (or whoever your mega-leadership-boss-man/woman is) is on an unhealthy road.

boomama asked me this question for last week’s blog blitz, and i think it is a topic seldom addressed, thus my reposting.  even though this is targeted toward assistants, it really applies to anyone who isn’t calling the shots.

Let’s say someone works as an assistant to a senior pastor / executive pastor / high-up-person-on-the-church-leadership-flowchart. And let’s say that someone who works as an assistant notices that his or her boss is stressed, anxious, tired - basically on the verge of burnout. Do you think there are any specific things that assistant could do for his or her supervisor to lighten the load? Or should the assistant just stay out of it?

my response:

To answer your question – YES. Absolutely YES. How will depend on that person’s relationship with their supervisor and it could take some serious guts…maybe even putting their job on the line in the worst case scenario….but we have a responsibility to carry each other’s burdens (See Galatians 6).

A few ways the assistant could do this practically:

1. Communicate it directly. Set some time up with the supervisor to specifically address this. Don’t throw it in the mix of another meeting. “The reason I wanted to meet with you today is because I’m concerned.” Explain the behavior you see that is worrying you.

2. Offer any assistance you can provide. If it’s something obvious like a particular project or area of responsibility, THINK AHEAD. Assistants know better than anyone the details of what’s happening. Make a plan ahead of time of how you can lighten the load and recommend it for the supervisor. Otherwise, you’re giving that person more work trying to figure out what you can do.

3. Encourage them consistently and appropriately. When I see my own boss getting stressed or overwhelmed, or maybe he indicates he’s had a long day, I shoot him a text message or quick email just to say how honored I am to work with him and that his passion for what he does is contagious. Small gifts for his or her family like a dinner out or offering to babysit so they can have time are both practical ways you can also encourage your boss.

4. Lead by example. You may be on support staff but people all around you see what you do. Are you contributing to a 24/7 workaholic, always available culture? Or do you have boundaries that you stick by? As an example, I don’t typically check my work email on the weekend. If I do, I won’t respond until Monday unless it’s a legit emergency. This is the culture on our church staff, but it has to be constantly made intentional. Talk freely about the time you spend with your friends or spouse. Leave on time. When you’re sick, stay home. All these things will communicate what is more important…work? Or health?

5. When all else fails, find someone else to help. It may be another pastor, or an elder, or a leader you know your boss trusts. If it doesn’t seem like your concern is having an impact and your leader is still about to fry, talk to someone else respectfully. Don’t spread rumors or talk about it with everyone…but find one or two key people that you know your supervisor will listen to.

Don’t EVER think “I’m just an assistant!” Who cares? You’re a believer! There is no hierarchy when it comes to caring for each other.

have you ever had to deal with a situation like this? anything you’ve learned along the way?

because really. caring for each other is the new black.

Someone left this comment on this post:

“If you are a pastor and want to know if you are the cause of burnout, look at your turn over rate, how many people have worked for you more than ten years, how many former employees still go to your church? Have you ever reached out to them?

That kicks you right in the stomach, doesn’t it?

Staff turnover (and volunteer turnover) in churches is HUGE.  And as pastors and leaders, we should ask ourselves those questions.

Your thoughts?

thank you guys so much for the great feedback on yesterday’s post.

this post offers a little bit more simplistic advice…if you’re already leading a tribe, or if you’re going to embark on an intentional journey to do so, this tip is probably one of the most important suggestions i can give you.

BE YOURSELF - DO IT WELL.

if being yourself means you have a huge tribe - do it well.

if being yourself means you have a small tribe - do it well.

if being yourself means your tribe is loved - do it well.

if being yourself means your tribe is criticized - do it well.

if being yourself means your tribe is long lived - do it well.

if being yourself means your tribe is short lived - do it well.

if being yourself means your tribe is popular - do it well.

if being yourself means your tribe is underground - do it well.

whatever it costs you, whatever it means to you, whatever it is that’s required of you…be yourself and do it well.

your tribe can’t exist without you.

be yourself.

do it well.

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congrats to andy (comment #55) for winning the copy of seth’s book, tribes (and thank you random.org for number generating for me!)

first, if you haven’t read seth godin’s latest catalog of wisdom, tribes, go get it now.  secondly, if you have ever wanted to make a huge difference in the world and the idea of working alongside seth for six months (or longer) sounds interesting, you’ve gotta read this.

anyway, today, i thought i’d talk a little bit about tribes - as in a movement of people, not the book.

one of the most frequently asked questions i get is “how can i increase the awareness of _______ (my church, my company, my blog) through social networking?  how can i get an online community like yours?”

usually i’ll give some general advice anyone can google about consistency, quality and interaction and end with a polite cyber high-five. 

go get ‘em tiger.

as i was thinking through it though, i realized not everyone should lead a tribe.  i’m not saying you have to have everything figured out to do it, nor am i saying that every tribe is built online.  but to lead a tribe in the most unclouded of ways, you’ve got to start off on the right foot.

so, without further adieu, here is the first tidbit of how to lead a tribe.

ask yourself if you’re ready.

how do you know?  try working through these questions to get you started.

do you have a mission to accomplish?  or is your mission to help others propel a cause forward?

do you want to increase your spotlight? or do you want to increase the spotlight on a specific cause, or group of people?

do you feel you have a lot to contribute?  or are you ready to share ideas and provide a space for others to contribute?

are you wanting to take full responsibility? or have you realized your responsibility is to inspire and empower a group of people to participate?

are you focused on utilizing your strengths to accomplish a goal?  or are you willing to incorporate the strengths and insight of others?

obviously, these questions aren’t fully defining.  neither are the first questions “wrong” and the second questions “right.” but the second questions are more tribal in nature, and if you’re only able to answer “yes” to the first questions, you might not be ready to lead a tribe just yet.

to play off the old adage, there is an “i” in the word “tribes” - but notice it’s right in the middle, surrounded by all the other letters.

without the others, the tribe couldn’t be.

are you in a position to lead?

(PS - I’ll be giving away a free copy of tribes today to a random commenter! Just throw in your two cents and you’ll be entered!)

even though i’m a “J” temperment (highly organized, structured), i am terrible at organizing my own goals.  heck, i am terrible at even setting goals. or boundaries. or any kind of future-planning things.

as 2008 comes to a close, the year 2009 is stalking me, hiding behind every corner, threatening to attack me with it’s scythe - the crazy schedule, book things, conferences, job stuff, and oh yes, relationships - all demanding time and energy.

after going through a large stack of brown paper bags, hyperventilating in each one until they were soggy with spit, i decided that now is the ideal time to set some boundaries and goals in place for next year before next year eats me for lunch.

and thus the five focuses of anne jackson’s 2009 were born.  i’m going to really laser in on these during the first six months, and adjust if i need to.

i hereby promise to focus on these five things, and these five things alone: (listed in no particular order, and puh-lease, do not be hatin’ saying “you left god off the list.”  god is interwoven through every fiber of my being and is too worthy to be placed on a silly list. thank you.)

1) my relationship with chris

2) my job and the people of cross point community church

3) things directly related to mad church disease and investing in church leaders

4) specific relationships i feel god leading me to nurture

5) fighting injustice and poverty by supporting compassion international

the things outside of these five focuses will get cheated.  but hopefully the things in these five focuses will become rich and valuable.

i’m learning if you don’t put some intentionality behind your actions, you really will be less effective, less healthy, and way more stressed out.

how do you process goals and your future? are you a list maker? or fly by the seat of your pants?  how have you seen your style work or not work?

“i can’t stand perry noble!”

i said that a lot to my husband a few years ago.

so, why the empathic disgust?  well, it’s obvious, don’t you think?  perry was bold and brash.  he had and shared his super strong opinions on church growth, how to do ministry, and a plethora of other terrible topics.  he was one of those pastors.  the ones that only cared about relevance and numbers.

a spiritual leader? pssshhhaw. what-ev-er.

and of course, the world needed to be warned.  back in my xanga blogging days, i actually encouraged people to send perry emails about a katrina relief campaign he was doing, saying how he was using a tragedy to get people into church (of all things!) i got into blog comment fights about him.  and once, i even had to ask tony morgan to remove one of the comments i left because after sleeping on it, i realized how flat out mean it was.

seriously.  perry and his blog made me so angry, i actually unsubscribed from it for a year or so.

and then my world got flipped upside down on me a few times.  i came crashing down in a pile of pride and self-righteousness and oh wow, was it ugly, and messy, and shameful.

and over the last year or so, i’ve had such clarity in how stupid i was.  how i was projecting my own lack of confidence and faith and pride and issues on perry.  i don’t know why he became the target, but he was.  i sent an email apologizing.  and perry was gracious enough not only to forgive me, but to selflessly contribute a “second opinion” section to mad church disease.

last night, i was talking to my husband chris at cracker barrel (which is what honestly sparked this whole post.  if you know anything about perry, you know his affinity for their biscuits).  and i saw the whole journey, from five years ago until now.  and how perry hasn’t changed much, but my perspective of him has.  and how that has little to do with him and more to do with the fact i stopped am trying to stop being a self-righteous jerk ball.

and i also think how i still read church blogs where someone thinks someone else’s church or ministry is awful, or how they’re doing things wrong, or for the wrong reason. or how they’re spending money inappropriately, or how “trendy” they are, or…whatever.

GET OVER IT.

that’s it. GET OVER IT.

it’s not worth it.  and if you’ve ever had the mirror turned back on you, you know exactly what i mean.

phillipians 1:18 has been a key verse in this journey of mine:

“So how am I to respond? I’ve decided that I really don’t care about their motives, whether mixed, bad, or indifferent. Every time one of them opens his mouth, Christ is proclaimed, so I just cheer them on!”

it’s easy to forget in general, but ESPECIALLY on blogs, there are so many people who aren’t believers looking in.  what kind of example are we setting?  that we’re a bunch of cry babies who can’t get along? a lot of the time…YES. that is exactly what we’re saying.

suck up the pride, bite your tongue, and listen to your momma.

if you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothin’ at all.

people will know us by the love we have for each other.

remember that.

i went and visited zondervan last week…i may or may not have gotten a few extra advance copies of mad church disease.

this contest is easy to win. it goes to the highest bidder.

(welp, ego…it was nice knowing you!) :-)

whoever donates the most pairs of shoes to the 50000shoes.com website between 6 am CST tuesday and 6 am CST wednesday wins. and i’ll even autograph it with your favorite bible verse, sprinkle holy water on it, engrave your name in gold, give you a bronze dove plaque, and throw in some snacks from my desk.

click here to read more stories of where your shoes are going!

oh, and here’s the icing on the cake. more truthfully, it’s probably the actual cake. be the highest bidder and not only will you get a hyper-anointed copy of MCD, you’ll also get an autographed copy of seth godin’s newest book, tribes. i know that’s nothing like snacks from my desk, but thought it might sweeten the deal. who knows? maybe he’ll throw in some snacks from his desk.

comment below (and yep, i’ll need proof if you are the highest donor if you do win!)

ready…go! how many shoes did you donate today?

it was in the wall street journal a couple weeks ago* and it was covered by the tennessean this weekend.

churches using mystery shoppers. or is it mystery worshippers?

eh, call it what you will.

from the tenneesean:

The person sitting next to you in church today may look like an average visitor, but be careful, he might be taking notes.

A growing number of churches are using mystery worshippers, consultants giving congregations the same kind of unbiased, unfiltered feedback that secret shoppers give retail stores or restaurants. The mystery worshippers give churches the kind of honest responses that newcomers almost never do. From angry parking lot attendants to boring sermons, they let the churches know what they are doing right and wrong.

you can read the rest here.

honestly, i have mixed thoughts on this. fresh eyes are a necessity. what does your sunday gathering communicate? is it consistent with what god has called your unique church to be? or are you missing the mark, but too close to see it?

on the other hand, is it necessary? if you’re fully relying on what you sense the holy spirit is leading you to do, and trusting he will bring the right people, the right connections all together at the right time, do you need a stranger coming in with critical eyes to tell you the letters on your signage aren’t big enough? i think back to churches in the united states, in europe, and in africa that i have visited - some with all the right signage and people in place but had no sense of community or spirit…and some with what we would call terrible “first impressions” but god was clearly moving with no regard to the out of tune guitar or the uncomfortable seats or stuffy worship center.

i’m not saying it’s right or wrong - i think this is a potentially subjective matter. but i do think it may be one that could be wrapped up a teensy bit too tightly in a layer of modern consumer mentality if we listen to everything we’re told or feel pressured that we should do.

jesus was confident in the way he went about his work, and as long as we have the same confidence, no mystery church shopper (or long time member, for that matter) should be needed or able to influence us away from that.

your thoughts?

—
*please note that my boss man was misquoted in the WSJ article — cross point church has never used a mystery shopper.

the catalyst conference is only a little over a week away and there are many opportunities for you to engage like never before — even if you’re not able to attend!

CATALYST BACKSTAGE

this year, catalyst is launching something new: CATALYST BACKSTAGE, which will be hosted by none other than yours truly!

the website’s not up yet (here’s a sneak peek)…but OH MY GOODNESS is this going to be cool - whether you are attending catalyst or even if you aren’t!

CATALYST BACKSTAGE will feature off-the-cuff, LIVE, exclusive backstage videos with catalyst speakers (and surprise special guests), a completely live, interactive chat open 24/7 so you can chat with other catalyst attendees and discuss what you’re learning during the sessions as they are happening — all in ONE PAGE! we’ll also be pulling in catalyst twitters (#catalyst08 is the hash tag), and other catalyst webby goodness we find throughout the event.

when i’m not backstage, i’ll be running around with my trusty FLIP video camera invading your personal space, hanging out with you, crashing parties, and showing the world what god is doing through you…these videos will be published on the CATALYST BACKSTAGE site as often as i possibly can so you’ll get to meet other leaders and see what’s going on in their worlds.

yes…i will be drinking a lot of red bull and no…i probably won’t be sleeping very much but having the opportunity to connect leaders with other leaders both inside and outside of the catalyst arena gets me SO pumped up!!!

HOW WE NEED YOUR HELP
in order to connect as many leaders as possible - we are going to need your help!

next week, i will have a post with sidebar widgets and buttons that will link to the CATALYST BACKSTAGE site and it will take a viral, web 2.0 miracle to spread this as wide and far as possible.

WHY?

we realize not everyone can attend catalyst so we want to be able to connect everyone as much as possible via this site through the leaders who are there chatting, through the videos and all the interaction! and we want those who are attending catalyst to be able to connect with each other as well.

so, feel free to start blogging about this now…and next week we’ll have some widgets for you…but this is so stinking exciting…i couldn’t hold it in anymore!

tomorrow…stay tuned for another amazing catalyst announcement!

can we count on your help for spreading the word?!

so you know when you used to get an “A” on your spelling test, your parents would put it up on your family’s fridge, right?

this is kind of the grown-up-i-love-marketing equivalent of that. mom, my name’s in business week! and i’m printing it off and putting it up on my fridge. along with seth’s head.

several months ago, business week interviewed me for an article on seth godin, and how his principles and brilliance have been absorbed in many channels — from corporations, to artists, and even to little girl bible bloggers (yours truly).

anyway, the article arrived today and you can read it here!

what’s one thing that seth has said that has stuck with you?

i stole this off brant hansen’s blog. brilliant, methinks.

———–

LeaderMan: Wants a platform on which to say something

Servant Leader: Has something to say

———–

LeaderMan: You almost feel you know his family, because he’s your Leader

Servant Leader: You allow him to influence you, because you know his family

———–

LeaderMan: Wants you to know he’s a Leader

Servant Leader: You’re not sure he knows he’s a leader

———–

LeaderMan: Loves the idea of the Gospel, and the idea of The Church

Servant Leader: Loves God and the actual individual people God brings across his path

———–

LeaderMan: A great speaker, but self-described as, “Not really a people person.”

Servant Leader: Makes himself a people person

———–

LeaderMan: Helps you find where God is leading you in his organization

Servant Leader: Helps you find where God is leading you

———–

LeaderMan: Gets together with you to talk about his vision

Servant Leader: Just gets together with you

———–

LeaderMan: Resents “sheep stealing”

Servant Leader: Doesn’t get the “stealing” part, since he doesn’t own anyone to begin with

———–

LeaderMan: Wants the right people on the bus

Servant Leader: Wants to find the right bus for you, and sit next to you on it

———–

LeaderMan: Shows you a flow chart

Servant Leader: Shows you his whole heart

———–

LeaderMan: A visionary who knows what the future looks like

Servant Leader: Knows what your kitchen looks like

———–

LeaderMan: If it’s worth doing, it worth doing with excellence

Servant Leader: Not exactly sure how to even calculate “worth doing”

———–

LeaderMan: Talks about confronting one another in love

Servant Leader: Actually confronts you in love

———–

LeaderMan: Impressed by success and successful people

Servant Leader: Impressed by faithfulness

———–

LeaderMan: Invests time in you, if you are “key people”

Servant Leader: Wastes time with you

———–

LeaderMan: Reveals sins of his past

Servant Leader: Reveals sins of his present

———-

LeaderMan: Gives you things to do

Servant Leader: Gives you freedom

———–

LeaderMan: Leads because of official position

Servant Leader: Leads in spite of position

———–

LeaderMan: Deep down, threatened by other Leaders

Servant Leader: Has nothing to lose

===

check out what my friend jeff and some of his cohorts did in his east atlanta neighborhood.  so cool.   three minutes. that’s all.

be love.

last night, i asked you what you’d like to hear if you were attending a breakout session or workshop about burnout.

“how do i say no?” was probably one of the most answered responses.

so…now i get to ask you, why can’t we say no? should we say no? how can we discern when to say no?